Amrit turned me onto a Network World article titled "12 Ways to Visualize Network Security" in which his analog of security as a cheese grater is featured.
Yup, there's castles and cars and...
In an attempt to annoy the crap out of everyone, I decided to start spewing out my candidates via twitter (beaker) so as to force as many un-follows as possible.
Here are some of my off-the-cuffs [remember, these have to fit in < 140 characters]:
- Security is like Escargot. It's crunchy on the outside, chewy on the inside, and like everything else, should be blamed on the French!
- Security is like Kimchee...to make it you have to slap it together, bury it and then dig it up when it smells to explain how special it is..
- Security is like Durian: It's lousy in airports, stinks when exposed and looks oddly out of place no matter how you slice it...
- Security is like fertilizer, the more shit you spread around the worse it gets and watering it down only makes it worse
- Security is like a vibrator, the more you have to use it, the less fun the real business becomes...
- Security is like weed, homeopathy and faith healing; sometimes nothing beats cutting the tumor out, but faith in snake oils is more fun
- Security is like a pig; well, 'nuff said.
- Security is like your '82 Ford Escort; you can keep telling everyone that it was your mom's ride & gets good mileage, but everyone knows...
- Security is like a pomegranate; seriously, who the fuck thought it was a good idea to try THAT!
- Security is like balut; when crunchy on the outside, chewy in the middle doesn't work, go crunchy everywhere? Sweet Jesus.
- Security is like a vacuum cleaner; both have dirtbags and "suckage" is the primary metric.
Sadly, nobody un-followed and instead I got like 10 new TwitterBots following me instead. Ain't that a bitch?
/Hoff
P.S. My man Mogull flung back some fine satirical smackage...nicely played, sir!:
